Cocooning As A Radical Act of Self-Care

Inspired by Audre Lord and the conscious choice to focus inward to move forward.

Audre Lorde, a radical queer theorist, feminist, and Black lesbian woman, proposed self-care as a way to survive adversity. She believed that self-care was a political act and a call for greater access to resources. In her 1988 book “A Burst of Light,” she wrote one of my favourite sentences ever: “Caring for myself is not self-indulgence, it is self-preservation, and that is an act of political warfare.”

The world can feel like a relentless tide of demands and expectations. That’s why choosing to cocoon is much more than an escape hatch for when life gets too overwhelming. It’s also a conscious, rebellious, empowering choice to focus inward, to recalibrate and grow.

Lorde’s words are so beautiful, and so relevant. Retreating inward, through that lens, becomes a radical act of self-care. It’s how you reclaim sovereignty over your time, your energy, and your focus. It’s where you say no to a culture that glorifies busyness and yes to the quiet power of reinvesting your vibe in you.

Cocooning is About Creation

You may think of recovery when you think of cocooning. And yes, withdrawing to manage your emotional responses when things get a bit much is a valid way to create space, allow your brain to rest, and restore your ability to deal with the ups and downs of your journey with less mental fatigue.

Neurobiologically, when you’re overstimulated, the amygdala - your brain’s alarm system - sounds the siren, flooding you with stress hormones like cortisol, adrenaline and noradrenaline. When you make the deliberate decision to pause, you engage the parasympathetic nervous system, aka your “rest, repair, and digest” mode. This balances stress hormones and promotes calm through neurotransmitters like serotonin and GABA. You also allow your prefrontal cortex, the seat of executive function, to regain “control,” with a caveat: I believe the feeling of control can be addictive, and that embracing life’s inevitable messiness is a necessary yang to its yin. This rebalancing isn’t just soothing; it’s restorative, setting the stage for clarity and creativity.

But cocooning is as much about going forward as it is about getting back to “normal.” Goodness, I despise that word!

When you “recover,” you go back to a prevous state that you may have idealised as being better than the one you’re in now. As you may be well aware of, this could be you gaslighting yourself about this, so the state you’re idealising could actually be completely unreal. Add a sprinkle of trauma to all of this, there’s a high chance that this is the case. On the flip side, creation is about moving forward, about imagination and possibility. Imagining cocooning not as retreating in fear but as stepping into a sanctuary, free from distractions, where you reinvest your energy in yourself to nurture new ideas is like the metamorphosis of a caterpillar, a space to shed, renew, and emerge stronger.

Your conscious turning inward activates your brain’s default mode network (DMN), the area linked to self-reflection and creativity. Scientists have identified this interconnected web of brain anatomical regions as the prime reason why psychedelics work on the brain to make people more self-aware and more self-compassionate after mystical experiences. In the absence of external noise, the DMN thrives, empowering you to tap into deeper reserves of insight. Pressing the pause button allows you to access similar clarity. And, unlike tripping, it makes space for a dopamine boost when you achieve that moment of personal revelation or creation. It’s the mental equivalent of clearing a cluttered room. As you remove some of the unnecessary jumble, you begin to notice once obscured details, gaining a precious, unprecedented sense of direction and understanding on your life’s choices. Nurturing the DMN through purposeful cocooning, you cultivate self-awareness and allow yourself to dream of the life you deserve.

Cocooning is About Responsibility

Cocooning is not a retreat from responsibility. Far from it, it’s a reclamation of it. When you step back to nurture your inner world, you are better equipped to engage with the universe that surrounds you. As Kristin Neff’s work on self-compassion reminds us, being kind to ourselves during these pauses isn’t indulgence, it’s fuel for resilience and growth. Cocooning, then, is an unspoken positive affirmation that’s played inwards, reaching every cell in your body, repeating this to yourself: “I am worthy of my own attention.”

Reframed, cocooning becomes a political act, a rebellion against a system that often equates your value with your productivity. It’s where growth happens, where ideas take root, and where the world’s demands recede long enough for you to hear your own voice, equipping yourself with renewed strength and insight to re-engage with life on your own terms. So, the next time you feel the pull to redirect your energy to yourself, don’t resist it.

I’m writing this from my own cocoon, where I’m leaning into the quiet to nurture the strength to create and thrive. Reflecting on Lorde’s teachings, it is clear to me that caring for ourselves isn’t self-indulgent, it’s about reclaiming our power to set boundaries and to prioritise our wellbeing. In 2024, that’s what makes it as much of an act of political warfare as it was in 1988. The world will still be there when you return, stronger, sharper, and ready to shine.

Love,